It started so innocently…


 

QUESTION:

so I was working late Tuesday day night on a new project at work. I had worked all that day and got out at 1 in the morning. Throughout the day a woman who just recently started working in my department volunteered to help me out and ended up leaving at the same time as me. Since she really helped me out and neither of us had ate anything, so I invited her to a local bar (Practically the only restaurant that was open) to get something to eat. We just talked about our backgrounds and general life’s and then went home right after(completely platonic). So when I get home my wife (of 3 years) asks me where I was, so i I told her, and then she flipped out. She started telling me that I had no right to be out with other woman. This led to a bigger argument about other things and now we’re basically not talking. I want to apologize just to be the bigger person but I don’t feel like I did anything wrong. Was I wrong to just have dinner with a her? I was just trying to be polite and appreciative.

ANSWER:

This is exactly why I encourage people never to go to breakfast, lunch, dinner, coffee dates etc…with an opposite sex co-worker. There have been so many relationship issues, affairs (physical and emotional) lawsuits, firings over relationships that started out very innocently. It doesn’t matter that YOU think it was platonic. You have no idea what she thinks. Your wife may have been over the top with something you did innocently, but in my opinion you shouldn’t do this again as there are too many risks involved with it. Make a commitment to her that it won’t happen again and then don’t let it happen again. This happened to me early on in my marriage. I got upset, but then realized what’s more important, my marriage or trying to keep a relationship with a co-worker. Choose your marriage before you get to the place of choosing a co-worker.
David
www.DavidSimonsen.net

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