Deal breaker for sure…


QUESTION:

 

Hi, I’m originally from southamerica, now living in Florida, I met this guy who was from Pa but moved down here to his mom and study. We texted each other for a while and tern I liked how he think about things and we would found each other intetesting and started dating and after some other weeks we started dating. Of course there are things different between us especially since the culture difference. Now we areabout to be3 months together, we love each others, I met his mom and he met mine. Everything was fine, of course we sometimes would argue like every couple. Before we started dating over hisfacebook, Ifoubd a comment from a girl saying that his baby was asking about him, I.didn’t take it seriously as I though he would told me in first place. Today while texting him I remembered and asked him if he had a child he would tell me right? He said yes I have a little daughter but was waiting for us to be really serious to tell you, over his work he can’t pick up phone calls, so of course I was in shock and hurt he would hide that from me. He dated this girl years ago and she wasn’t being responsible with the contraceptive pills and got pregnant, after the baby was born she just left him. That is what he said and of course I would doubt since he wasn’t being honest with me.from the beginning but he said again he would easily lied if he wanted and I think he would also have deleted the comment in that case or maybe he just forgot. I find myself here wondering, still on shock and dobt know what to do. He loves one hour and a half away and we only see each other on weekends since we both work and study all the time. I ould like to see anyone’s opinion and maybea little of help. I love him but I know hiding a baby from your patbet even if it was a short period of time hurts and make me feel insecure. Our main problem always its that we argue he is always on his defensive mode,I know he was hurt and on cheated before so that makes him be cold sometimes. I dont know what to do.
Thanks you

ANSWER:

In my opinion this is a deal breaker. I would move on to someone with much less baggage. The first thing he should have told you is that he has a child. He was giving you the impression that he has not attachments and that a future child with you would have been his only one. I believe the reason he was waiting because it would be harder for you to let go of him once you were more emotionally connected to him. I would suggest you put emotion aside and think about this with your brain. If you stay with him and marry him someday this girl will then be in your lives. One doesn’t know what the outcome of that will be. I would say it’s too risky to stay with him and see what happens in regards to this little girl.

David

http://www.help4life.net

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