Did you have conjugal visits…



My boyfriend (ex boyfriend) was in prison for 10 years. (16yrs -26yrs for armed robbery) We started a relationship 2 years before he got out. We talked about how our relationship would be when he finally came home, most including spending a lot of time together. However, when he came home we didn’t spend much time together. I had to share time with family and friends that weren’t even there for him. I didn’t have a problem with him spending time with his family and friends but i felt as though we weren’t spending enough time together. I would maybe see him twice a week for about an hour or 2 and he lives right around the corner. He spent more time with his friends than me and whenever i would ask him if i could see him more he would get upset or tell me that he would try and see me. Was i smothering him by wanting to spend time with him. I have been away from him for the whole 2 years we have been together. He eventually broke up with me because we would get into arguments about the lack of time spent and the fact that he was basically living a life that i wasn’t a part of.  He was very cold and vindictive during the break up and now wants nothing to do with me. Am i missing something here?



I think you may have been used. Here was a guy who needed connection with someone and you provided that while he was in prison. You were a lifeline let’s say to the outside world. You gave meaning to him. Now that he is out he doesn’t need that any longer. He is able to connect with numerous other people and I think you are seeing that happen. I think what you may want to do is learn from what has happened and move on. While it may be hard to swallow that you were used it is what I think happened.



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