Gifted and spoiled…


QUESTION:

My son is very bright but does not apply himself to his school work.  (mostly C’s but sometimes F work)  I’ve been told that this is not unusual for a “gifted” – advanced learner.  My son has told me that the class work is boring, the other students unengaging.  I do not believe punitive actions, i.e. no online games, no pc games, etc., have a positive impact.  My husband and I disagree on this and it is causing “friction”.  Any suggestions on how to motivate my son to work to his potential?

ANSWER:

People respond best to positive rewards, but they also respond to negative consequences. This is something that has been proven over and over again in studies so why would you go against this with your own child. I would suggest that earning the chance to do games etc.. is not punitive it is reward based. I get that you don’t want to take away things, but how does that prepare him for his future. Society usually rewards based on the amount of work one does. It’s the social welfare system that often rewards for no work. I think you need to not only think about what you are doing in the here and now, but also look to the future because what you teach him now will impact him in the future.

David

www.help4life.net

 

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