You shouldn’t marry…

QUESTION: My boyfriend and I are in a serious long term relationship and we plan on getting married in two years. When we’re married we’d like to move to South Carolina, we currently live in New Jersey along with our families. My main problem is that my mom is very much against us moving to SC, she has said that she will put up a fight and pitch a fit and that it’s not ok.   I’ve talked to my boyfriend about this and he has said that he will pay to fly my parents down and that they can stay with us as long as they want and that they could even live with us. However, my mom is very stubborn and she doesn’t want to move anywhere and she says she is living in her dream house and doesn’t want to leave. She’s even said that even moving to PA or NY would be too far for her.   My main question is what to do. I’ve gotten into the whole idea of moving and want to go, and I also know that it is a dream of his to live there. How do I go about talking to my mom about this? I have 2 years before it needs to be discussed but it’s really bothering me. I’m really worried about dealing with how she is going to act. What is the best way to bring this up to her without upsetting her too much? I know she can’t keep me from going but it could put a strain on my relationship with her and I don’t want that to happen. Thank you for reading this and your help.

ANSWER: If you are unable to simply leave with the man you will be making vows with then you shouldn’t be married. It’s obvious your mom is being unreasonable, but for you to fret over it is also unreasonable. It is your life not your mom’s. Parents raise kids to leave not stick around. If you waffle on this issue it will come to be a negative thing in your marriage. If your mother is going to continue to be so selfish, it’s a GREAT thing that you won’t be in contact with her, she would probably ruin your marriage. Move with your husband it is the right thing to do. David www.help4life.net