He’s a big boy…


  QUESTION:

My 18 year old son has just walked out the door because he said “he can’t live in my house with my rules.” He is 31/2 months away from graduating from high school. He has no money, no car, no phone and no job. His father and I divorced 4 years ago. Last year his dad moved to California and rarely speaks with him. He just recently got suspended from school for 45 days because beer was found in the trunk of his car during a search of his car in the school parking lot. His suspension was reduced to 10 days pending following the recommendation of a designated counseling center for troubled teens. The center recommended group counseling twice a week for 3 months. He has completed one month so far. He moved out after he went out last night and was to be home at 12:30am. He did not come home and choose to stay at a friends’s house without telling me or calling. I called him this morning and told him he was grounded because he broke my house rule. He lied and didn’t follow the rules. At this point he said he couldn’t live here any more and left. I have no idea where he is or how he is. What can I do?

  ANSWER:

While this is distressing to you it seems that he is acting like he has been somewhat spoiled. I know this was a while ago, but If it continues I would encourage you to accept that he wants to be an adult and help him become one. This would mean stop paying for things, make him responsible for things, because really…does he have it so bad?? If you react by making things easy for him you fall into the trap that he is setting for you. If he lives in your home he needs to be respectful in it.
David
http://www.help4life.net

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