Sister-in-law troubles…


Good day David, I’ve been married for a year and I have a 5 month old baby girl. I love my husband so much and I want things to work out. My ONLY problem i have is his sister in law (His brother’s wife) I can’t stand her. She flirts with him all of the time and she brags about how close they are. He claims that he is not close with her and she is full of it. Yet, when they are in front of my face they are both secretive. I told him him that I am very uncomfortable with I’m around her and he said to me then stay away! I want to be a family with them so bad and I think I’m try to hard to be part of it.She doesn’t like me and I don’t know why. She only invites him over to dinner and she will not tell him to bring us over. FYI, we live next door to each other! Literally next door—5 feet away! She runs her mouth to him if I come home late and then he yells at me. She doesn’t know if I’m stuck in traffic. She loves to see us fight. I think he tells her our problems and I believe she gets a kick out of it! I’m dreading having her over for Christmas. My husband gets mad at me when ever I mention her and how rude she is to me! I’m sad but I want things to work. I just want to be a family. He is close to my family but my family is NICE.


Ray, The unfortunate thing about this situation is that you knew that this was the case before you married this guy and you thought it would change? If he actually said what he said about staying away then I would consider separating until he sees the error of his ways. What you describe is pretty outrageous behavior. If true I wouldn’t be surprised if there is something sexual going on between them. Until he is willing to change his behavior I really think you should move back in with your parents or family and seek out marital therapy to get something figured out with this guy.


2 thoughts on “Sister-in-law troubles…

  1. HI, your situation with your husband touched me in many ways. I agree that this is a serious situation and a betrayal. I was not married but my long time boyfriend had an affair with my best friend and it was a lot of the same behaviours: namely flirting, being together “as friends”, secrecy, and denial. I, too, told my boyfriend many times I though something was going on. At one point, he got mad at me and told me to stop because my jealousy and suspicion was “ruining us” and I had to stop. I did and we moved out of town. My “best” friend then came to our housewarming party and told me of the affair. So what I learned is to trust your instincts or you get betrayed twice, once by the people in your life, and then I let myself down because I did not trust my intincts, choosing to trust others because I too did not want to break up with my boyfriend, I wanted it to work. We tried to work it out, but eventually we broke up and the broken trust was the biggest issue. For me, it was not the affair so much that hurt, as the fact that he lied to me over and over and I believed him.
    I believe that couples can survive affairs, but it takes a lot of work. If your husband would rather stay in denial, I would say take steps to take care of yourself, validate your truth and your instincts, and insist on getting what you deserve: an honest relationship. I like the idea of therapy because I know how hard it can be when you are in a bad situation and you want to work it out. If your husband won’t go, go by your self. Good luck!

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