I’ve got quite a problem. My mother is a nightmare. I can assure you this is no exaggeration. She cannot hold a normal conversation. She comes across very rude and abrupt despite being told so many times about how she comes across. She also acts very arrogant and practically refuses to sympathize with me if I’m going through a difficult time or if I’m stressed. I’m not playing a martyr role but I do so much in the house. I have no social life because of it – I help with every chore possible, any admin work needed I do, anything technical like setting up TVs, using remotes that sort of stuff. I know it doesn’t sound like much but after a while it gets exhausting.I don’t mind doing all these things but it’s a real p**stake when she comes out with stuff like that. Despite being the ‘mother’ she does hardly anything. She has no job, she cooks about four times a week maximum and our clothes are hardly ever washed or ironed. She then has the nerve to shout at me and say she does ‘so much around here’ and despite helping in so many ways she says a few things ‘aren’t my business’. On top of that she complains that she needs a break because it’s ‘too much’. I will be going away to university in 6 weeks but I’m at the end of my tether. Please help me – I’ve never been so desperate for help.
You actually can say no and don’t have to do those things if you don’t want to. I think that you shouldn’t blame your mother for what you willingly participate in. You know what to expect from your mother so it shouldn’t surprise you that she does all this stuff. You have to be the one who breaks this cycle. You need to let your mother start doing things on her own and then leave for university. I suggest you start going out at least 3 times a week with friends and let your mother start fending for herself.