i have been going out with my boyfriend for over 2 years. and has never verbally abused me… ever. however, just recently, he has has mean things to say to me. and it just started about the time he moved in with me. one time he told me, “i like bashing you in the f*ing teeth.” i let it go. i didn’t say anything. he has also said to me at times to “shut the f***-up.” another time he poured water on my knees. and as he walked off he said, “i could f*ing punch you right now if i could get away with it.” i let him go. but now he is wearing me down with apologies. and i find myself missing him… the nice part of him. please help. these are red flags… correct? or should i trust him when he said he will never do it again. but even after he has said that… he has sent me “not so nice” text messages. he was upset. i’m not sure why i love him still. i know i sound like this dumb girl. but i really am torn. my friends do not like him. his friends say i over reacted by letting him go and kicking him out. i would deeply appreciate you input. thank you!
You must think of yourself as not worthy of better behavior. He is a loser and you are hoping that you have the magic to fix him. You can choose to stay with him, but if you do you are risking so much. I also think that you shouldn’t be having kids with this guy. They need stability and this is not a stable relationship. The best thing you could probably do is move back in with family. You need help to learn how to expect good behavior from the people who care about you. This isn’t love it is dysfunction that for some reason you like to have around you. You should figure out why and change your life. If you don’t, you can continue to expect this bad behavior from him.