I have been in a relationship for almost 2 years, and have declared myself in love for the most of it, almost from the very beginning.
He’s a great guy and he’s attentive and etc. Our relationship has been rocky over the past months, but we’ve been taking it with a grain of salt, and we’re creating better times everyday. We’re also being completely honest with each other, in order to get our relationship back to where it was when we first started dating, or at least try. In that process I found that I was not really in love with him. He called me out on that, and it took me a while to come to terms with it, but I now do believe it. He’d do everything for me, give up his friends, give me his everything. He asked me to do the same…and I just couldn’t. Looking back, i can tell I was not really in love because I think I’d be the type of person who would do the same, and have it not matter because he’s the only one who matters. It’s safe to say he was in love by himself. That hurts me to say, but I do want to be in love with him, and I do want to love him, like he loved me.
So, is it possible to fall in love if you want to? I really can see myself being in love with him, but I know it takes letting go of the past, and just working to better us. and how will I “know” if there are sure fire signs.
Being in love is a feeling. It stays as a feeling by doing actions that are consistent with love. This means forgoing your own desires to make life better for the person that you love. It isn’t easy by any means, but it is something that needs to happen in order for a relationships to succeed. If you treat him in a loving way then your love will last. If you stop then the love will do. Look at any relationship you know. If you see it lasting you probably will see the people in it acting loving towards one another.