Helloooo, boundaries please…


  Q:In a blink of a eye my whole life changed.  Before my son went to middle school he was a good boy who never did anything wrong.  He was diagnosed with aspergers when he was in first grade. He always needed me to rub his back at night and pick out his clothes in the morning etc. Then he went to middle school and everything changed I don’t know if it’s puberty or the video games he plays but now he wont go anywhere with me he always talks to me like I’m a jerk & he never wants to listen to me.  He could sit in the room playing his stupid video games for 8 hours.  He never appreciates anything I do, he doesn’t want to help out around the house, he never takes care of his dog all he wants to do is play video games. I just feel like I’m always talking to a wall because he never listens and if I tell him something he doesn’t like he say’s “don’t tell me what to do”. I do give my kids what I can and believe me that’s not much compared to the kids in our town.  How can I show him I’m the boss? How can I pull in the rains a little?  What can I do to get him to appreciate me?  His father was in and out of his life until he was three then he only saw him once a year if that, he hasn’t seen him in over a year he never ask to either.  I need help before it is to late.
 

 

A:You NEED boundaries with this kid. You let him play video games way too much, he probably rules the roost. If you want to get some type of influence back in his life you need to provide boundaries to him. He will buck it at first because he is not used to it, but eventually he will get used to it. I would also suggest you find a male role model for him to connect with maybe your father and uncle or grandfather. I also suggest you don’t date or marry until he is out of your home. If you bring a man into your life, it will be one more stressor between your son and you.

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